Saying no in your life can be one of the hardest things to do. And getting the right tone, in addition. Once you understand the benefits of saying no, your life will change forever.

benefits of saying no

There are so many benefits of saying no with confidence and strength. It is hugely empowering to do so when everything is pulling at your heartstrings to say ‘yes’. So what is stopping you from doing what is best for you? It could be you like to please others all the time to your own detriment. You don’t feel comfortable saying no. The fear is that it could create conflict and unpleasantness which most of us don’t like or want in our lives. You will do anything to keep peace and harmony in your family, with your friends and colleagues.

Yet, what you don’t realise or you deny to yourself is that you feel resentful, angry and irritated making you feel trapped. You don’t enjoy what you said you would do and may even lash out at the person who you are doing it for. Of course, they don’t understand why and feel hurt. They most probably will hit back and so it goes on creating underlying friction and tension that never fully goes away.

As a result, this can get in the way of loving and kind relationships and friendships.

how does saying no change your life

What you find is that you will:

  • begin to value yourself
  • feel confident and strong in doing what suits and benefits you
  • have more time in your life to do the things you actually want to do
  • be more productive in what you do
  • make considered decisions that suit you
  • become more self-disciplined by not checking social media, your phone and emails all the time and responding immediately
  • be fully present without constantly thinking and worrying about your decision
  • no longer find the need nor courage to justify or explain yourself

When you feel confident and value yourself, life becomes truly meaningful and joyful for you. It takes on a whole new meaning. Where you saw negativity, you now see positivity and abundance. You are leading the life you want, not how you think you should or dictated to by others.

tips to overcome your reluctance in saying no

It takes time, effort and patience to make changes and see yourself in a different life. Saying ‘no’ is so ingrained in your daily way of being that it has become very much part of you and how you see yourself in life. Begin to ask yourself the following questions:

  • do I really want to do this?
  • Is this a waste of my time?
  • Will this add to my life or take away from it?
  • Can I get it done if I say yes?
  • Am I being authentic, if I say yes?
  • If I say yes, even though, I don’t want to do it, can I do it with grace?

Take time out regularly to keep checking in with yourself; are doing what you want to do? Look at your diary each day and see what you could change or not do at all. Then check in with how this makes you feel. If you sitting quietly, do a body scan meditation to see what your body is telling you. This way you will get to recognise the signs that you are going against you. To understand more about the benefits of body scan meditations, read my blog on ‘what is a body scan meditation’.

conclusion of the benefits of saying no

You will begin to notice changes in your emotional and physical well-being. Your energy levels will rise giving you more vitality to have fun and experience. Time will be on your side. You will plow through what you need and want to with a wonderful sense of achievement. And lastly, you feel more in control of your life without having to justify, excuse or explain. It simply means no. This doesn’t mean you will never say ‘yes’ to things. And when you do, you will really mean it. It means you learn to look at why you constantly can’t say ‘no’.

And lastly, listen to this guided meditation to help you say no.

“Let today mark a new beginning for you. Give yourself permission to say NO without feeling guilty, mean, or selfish. Anybody who gets upset and/or expects you to say YES all of the time clearly doesn’t have your best interest at heart. Always remember: you have a right to say NO without having to explain yourself. Be at peace with your decisions.” ~ Stephanie Lahart

meet chantal

Chantal Vanderhaeghen is an intuitive guide, small business owner, creator of an international skincare brand, passionate philanthropist and meditation, reiki, tapping and mindfulness teacher. She works with women ready to make changes, shatters perceptions of beauty and perfection, and inspires people ready to become mindful entrepreneurs. She lives with her talented man in the Perth Hills and can be found online at



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