Forgiveness is all about releasing and letting go. It is one of the most powerful things you can do for yourself. Yet, it is also one of the hardest.
why forgiveness is power to you
Because it frees you. It frees you to open your heart to feel love and joy again. When you have been so very hurt, you shut down and withdraw. You close your heart off to so many pleasures in your life. It takes courage to acknowledge and accept any pain you have or you have caused to yourself and / or someone else.
It seems so much easier to hold on to the pain, resentment, self-righteousness, and anguish. What you don’t realise is that forgiving opens you up to the world again. It isn’t about not condoning what happened to you and letting the person or yourself off the hook. And it isn’t about minimising your experience and making excuses. Even though, it can feel like that.
It is about releasing all that negativity being held in your mind, body and soul. That is why forgiveness is so important. It allows you to break away from the past freeing you emotionally, mentally and physically. Yes, physically. All this unforgiving emotion is also held in your body. It can appear in a myriad of health issues that seem totally unrelated to being unforgiving. Instead of feeling closed off to the world and constricted, you feel open and expansive. That is why forgiveness is power to you.
why forgiveness frees your body, mind and soul
You free your mind from these constant hurt, revengeful thoughts and resentment. These eat you up alive. They make you feel ‘yucky’ affecting your health. This can lead to anger, depression, anxiety, constant stress and loss of connection to the world. All of this trapped energy limits you from leading the life you want to lead. Holding on serves no purpose other than you holding onto the grudge and not being able to let go. You close yourself off from the world and all the amazing experiences you are having right now. You simply don’t see or feel them.
Forgiving changes your life around. In fact, it makes you a stronger person – stronger than you can imagine. What can hold you back from forgiving is pride, self-righteousness and vulnerability. It took me a long time to understand why forgiving was so vital to my happiness. I felt all of the above. Looking back now, I can see how much I potentially lost out in life.
what does forgiving entail
It is about truly surrendering to your pain, hurt, anger and then letting it all go. This can take time, depending on the level of pain. This is what has worked for me. As I write and meditate in my sacred space, I do the following. And when it has been really tough I have sought professional help.
- name your pain and hurt and by whom (it can also be yourself)
- acknowledge that you feel these emotions
- accept that you are feeling them
- surrender and let go
This can be difficult to start off with, as most of you would have been taught to not only not show emotion, let alone express it. You may have become numb and unaware of what you are actually feeling. And if you do feel an intense emotion, like anger, you deny it and brush it off. Be patient with yourself as you are delving deep within. And that takes courage and vulnerability.
benefits of forgiveness
These are a few of the many benefits you will experience. And I am sure each one of you will have your own sense of how different you will feel after forgiving.
- you will feel so much joy again in your life
- you will feel free and full of energy as your vitality will come back
- your stress levels will reduce dramatically over time and your health will improve – eg. less headaches, lower blood pressure, better immune system, less fatigue
- your sleep will be so much better as you will no longer be recounting the story over and over again in your mind
Now, the other thing is that you can do all of this without the other person even knowing. Because the most important part of this is that you have forgiven and let go to lead the life you want to.
Listen to this short guided meditation to get you started. And if you would like work with me on how to start forgiving, click on this link to book an initial clarity session or dive right in with one of the programmes on offer.
“Forgiveness is not always easy. At times, it feels more painful than the wound we suffered, to forgive the one that inflicted it. And yet, there is no peace without forgiveness”
Chantal Vanderhaeghen is an intuitive guide, small business owner, creator of an international skincare brand, passionate philanthropist and meditation, reiki, tapping and mindfulness teacher. She works with women ready to make changes, shatters perceptions of beauty and perfection, and inspires people ready to become mindful entrepreneurs. She lives with her talented man in the Perth Hills and can be found online at www.unfoldyoufreedom.com.au
how you can work with me